You have pointed out the actions that are causing, in your view, her problems. But I don’t think you’ve bothered to ask her “why?” Why does she buy the Culture Club 40th Anniversary 1981 2021 thank you for the memories shirt passes and the costumes? Why does she let them open credit in her name? Just because you handcuff someone doesn’t mean they won’t continue to itch. They’re not itching for the hell of it. There’s a reason they take their hand and scratch a certain spot. If you lock their hands, sure, they stop itching… At least on the outside. But did you even bother to ask why they itch in the first place?